Squirl's Nest

Sunday, April 03, 2005

Who Nose?

About twelve years ago I was waitressing in a little restaurant in the small village of Nunica. It wasn’t a high-class place, but it was one of only two restaurants in the whole village. It was a second job. If you worked enough hours you could make enough tips to make it worth your while.

Anyway, it was almost closing time one evening. The lights in there were never bright at night. I was clearing tables, in a bit of hurry, hoping to get home soon. I guess I moved a little too quickly for my own good.

As I bent over to pick up a tray of dishes and glasses I had a very uncomfortable feeling in my nose. As I straightened up from the tray I realized I had one of those long, skinny bar-type straws stuck up tight in there. I pulled it out as fast as I could. First, it was embarrassing. Then, eeeewwwww, that had been in someone’s mouth!

To this day I thank God that I never contracted any horrible nostril disease.


Blogger greatwhitebear said...

Strange nostril disease? LOL....

Since you mentioned on my blog you have been recently carded...you now must particpate in self portrait thursday..... gotta rev up that sibling rivalry (Bucky has already mentioned you are way ahead in rack dept.), so who looks younger?

Sun Apr 03, 08:09:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Wow, I hafta to do self portrait Thursday, huh? I can tell you right now, Bucky definitely has better hair. She's way more techy than I am. I still have to learn how to get pictures on my blog. I'll see what I can do. :-)

Sun Apr 03, 09:02:00 PM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Oh, Squirl, don't be modest about your rack.
And sadly, Squirl looks like she's younger than I am, even though she's, uh, kinda not. All that darn clean livin' and all.

Sun Apr 03, 09:16:00 PM  
Blogger April said...

ewww.. straw up your nose! You wanna know something even more gross! I work at a hotel (Front desk) and it is our duty to do laundry. I've seen some pretty nasty stuff. One time I was in a hurry and bent down to grab a couple dirty towels and throw them in the washer, well usually I use gloves, I didn't think I needed them for this quick task... NO WRONG answer! seconds later, I was gagging and dry heaving at the fact I just stuck my hand in a towel COVERD in baby shit and blood.. I washed my hands for like fifteen minutes straight. I'm not the brightest sometimes!

Mon Apr 04, 01:18:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Bucky, you know I'm aging every day. UGH. Next time you're over we should do a NOW sister shot. We could really scare 'em.

April - You win the gross contest. How many years will it take till you really feel clean after that?????

Mon Apr 04, 09:25:00 AM  
Anonymous LadyBug said...

Um, I was gonna make a comment about your post, but then I read April's comment, and I think I have to go throw up now.


Mon Apr 04, 10:04:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Yes, Ladybug, April's comment wins today's gross-out story award.

Mon Apr 04, 10:22:00 AM  
Blogger Effie said...

Eeeew! April grossed me right out! As far as the nostril thing--some people only use those skinny straws for stirring their drinks so maybe it was a clean straw....I did that one once--it hurts, eh?! Mine was with my straw though--I was carryinga huge pile of pop cans (some with straw and some without) to the recycling...

Mon Apr 04, 11:00:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Effie, I hope you're right about it only being used to stir. Still not sure if I was more worried or embarrassed. At least it was late and not too many customers were there.

Yes, it hurt. I guess I'm not the kinda person to be sticking things up my nose. Sorry you had to experience the same thing.

Mon Apr 04, 11:14:00 AM  
Blogger Courtney said...

Ooh, I think I may be a contender for the gross contest, marginally. I was a waitress at a Perkins, and every week the "stinky lady" would come in for a take-out order as she wasn't allowed to dine in the restaurant. One day a newbie was hosting, and unknowingly sat her at a booth. The two managers were trying to figure out how to ask her to leave, when a horrible smell wafted towards the kitchen. She took a huge, runny dump in the booth! And I'll say no more, as I'm about to chuck. :P

Mon Apr 04, 12:52:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Oh, Courtney, that really is gross. I think you're the runner up today. April's wins just because she actually touched it! If you tell me you had to clean up that mess, it might be a different story. :-)

Mon Apr 04, 01:46:00 PM  
Blogger JessicaRabbit said...

Ok I was going to post about how I like a girl who can handle alittle nose action but then everyone got all poop and gross and stinkyness in here.

We really are all a bunch of fecalpheliacs you know this right?

Mr. Hankey would be proud.

Mon Apr 04, 03:20:00 PM  
Blogger JessicaRabbit said...

Bucky accused me of trying to give you rabies.

Bucky is a bully.

Mon Apr 04, 07:27:00 PM  
Blogger SierraBella said...

There was an urban legend where I worked (it was always another office) where a co-worker was scheduled to work alone one Saturday (which was a no-no at the time.) This person fell off a ladder, breaking their neck, and wasn't found until the following Monday, dead.
Knowing my company, they most likely tried to claim it was a suicide.

Mon Apr 04, 08:17:00 PM  
Blogger April said...

I think Courtney's is way worse, I mean I'm doin' laundry, you have to expect icky stuff, but taking a crap in a booth in a Perkins?!! GROSS! That is something that NO waitress would be expecting! By the way, just as a heads up, always ask for clean blankets when you stay at a hotel! Do you KNOW how often they gets washed?! The law states they only have to be washed once a month! (we wash ours more because we have an INSANE, germaphobic general manager!)

Mon Apr 04, 08:26:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Jess, I didn't see where Bucky accused you of giving me rabies. Isn't it the squirrels that usually pass on the rabies?

This did turn into a bit of a poop-fest didn't it?


Mon Apr 04, 08:33:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Sierrabella, I bet they didn't pay that person the overtime to the end of his/her shift either. Suicide, that's funny, but I'm not quite sure I should be laughin'

April, you and Courtney both have some pretty gross stuff in here. Thanks for helping to liven it up.

No sarcasm - Your comments are always appreciated.

Mon Apr 04, 08:36:00 PM  
Blogger nonono said...

good story. made my nose hurt

Mon Apr 04, 10:44:00 PM  
Blogger Nilbo said...

Love the blog, squirl ... but I refuse to participate in comparing your rack with your sister's. I can appreciate both a yez ....

Mon Apr 04, 11:29:00 PM  
Anonymous Xuxa said...

I went to a party in Nunica once and there were 2 people there who had six fingers on one of their hands. That was the last time I've ventured to Nunica other than passing through!

Tue Apr 05, 09:01:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Radish - Glad you liked the story. Sorry it made your nose hurt. Brought back memories for me in the retelling. :-)

Nilbo - Thanks for coming over. No need to compare. There's really no sibling rivalry here. And I do have Bucky to thank that I now have my very own blog.

Xuxa - Are you from Michigan? I didn't think too many people had even heard of Nunica. Two people with six fingers on their hands? I never met them. Or if I did they didn't let me know about it. If I were you I wouldn't go there again either. :-)

Tue Apr 05, 09:24:00 AM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Squirl - how's the rabies this morning? Do you even know what I'm talkin' about? I think it was a comment on the RSA. You don't expect me to keep track of what I say and where I say it, do you?

Nilbo - Squirl's got the superior rack. I would go all into cup size, but I don't wanna get walloped next time I visit.

Tue Apr 05, 09:34:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Bucky, yes, last night I saw where you were warning Jess about inciting rabies in me over her boyfriend's shirt. :-)
No walloping, but probably better to leave 'em guessing.

Tue Apr 05, 09:38:00 AM  

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