Squirl's Nest

Friday, April 22, 2005

Could you turn that up a little, please?

I've mentioned in here before how Ichabod knows how to make me really, really angry. It's always over stupid stuff, too. That man!

We were living in the downstairs apartment of an old nineteenth century home. It was originally built for one family and the wood floors gave absolutely no soundproofing between our apartment and the one above.

Apartment living is hard for me sometimes because when I want quiet, I want quiet. When I want to make noise I don’t want to bother anyone else. This apartment was so wrong in all those ways.

Because it had been a single-family home one of the bedrooms was directly above our living room. I tried to keep the TV quiet. Sometimes I would even use headphones early in the morning as the guy upstairs worked a late shift.

My DVD player had a problem with volume. Sometimes the volume would start to drop and I’d have to keep turning it up to hear it. This particular time I had the volume all the way to the max.

All of a sudden the sound came back full blast. I tried to mute it and then drop the volume, which didn’t work. I was slowly getting the volume back down when Ichabod shouted, “Why don’t you turn it up? I can’t hear it.”

I was so pissed. I went over to where he was sitting. All I could think to do was hit him in the knee with the remote control. Picture this: I was standing in front of him with my knees bent, arms bent at the elbow, bending up and down at the waist, almost hitting him on the knee with the remote and yelling, “Shut up! Shut up! Just. Shut. Up!!!!!”

At the time even I knew how stupid it was. He was laughing his ass off at me. After about a half hour I was laughing too. In fact, it still cracks me up.

36 comments

Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Uh, couldn't we have a photographic recreation of this event? I know you can show me in person, but I think everyone else here would enjoy the visual, too.
Warning: Squirls with Remote Controls May be Hazardous to Your Kneecaps. Now shut up!

Fri Apr 22, 12:35:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

You're cracking me up. Maybe when you come over you can take the picture for us. Ichabod will be more than happy to pose.

Fri Apr 22, 12:41:00 PM  
Blogger SierraBella said...

I sometimes wish I could turn down the volume on my husband with the remote. Guess knocking him senseless would work?

Fri Apr 22, 02:32:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Sierrabella - Yes, that would work. He would eventually come to again and then there's no guarantee what the noise level would be.

Fri Apr 22, 02:50:00 PM  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

I live near a Blockbuster. Someday I plan on staying home from work just to count the song snippets I hear from car stereos coming through dropping off their vids.

Fri Apr 22, 02:56:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Mr B, another change to your profile pic. I can't keep up with 'em. My radio would be playing NPR, so not much music there. Lately, though, the CD I have been playing is the one where Queen Latifah sings songs that were written long before Hip-Hop.

Fri Apr 22, 03:03:00 PM  
Anonymous LadyBug said...

I've had those moments, too, Squirl, when I just get so mad I get downright stupid.

The other day I got frustrated and angry, and my mind was already weary, and I heard myself saying, "Well, JESUS CHRIST ON A DONUT!"

[Note: I almost never use "Jesus Christ" in that manner, so I was as surprised as anyone to hear this, um, colorful(?) phrase coming out of my mouth.]

Deputy Dad looked at me like I was certifiably insane (which I was, I think, at that moment), so I broke the tension with, "It's the new flavor at Krispy Kreme."

We laughed for a good long while over that one.

Fri Apr 22, 03:17:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Ladybug, that's great! I have to tell Ichabod we need to go have a religious experience at Krispy Kreme. I am really laughing out loud at that one. :-)

Fri Apr 22, 03:24:00 PM  
Blogger Spurious Plum said...

Why is it that when we're at our maddest, people find a way to make fun of us? It's not fair... but it is really funny!

Fri Apr 22, 04:32:00 PM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Plum, men do not value their danglies because every one I've ever met thinks it's funny to bait me and piss me off.

They'll never find the bodies.


Squirl, do you give two paws up to the Queen LaQueefa album? I thought that looked interesting when I read about it.

Fri Apr 22, 05:17:00 PM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Hey, when did you change it to Squirl's Nest? Me likey!

Fri Apr 22, 05:18:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

I changed to Squirl's Nest this afternoon. I was inspired. Don't know by what.

Yes, I very much like her new album. If it tells you anything, it's mostly the kind of music that I like to sing.

Spurious, I'm with Bucky. I don't know why guys feel so safe making us so mad. It's when he laughs at me for looking like an ass that I get the maddest. :-)

Fri Apr 22, 05:26:00 PM  
Blogger Susie said...

I'm usually vehemently opposed to domestic violence, but I could get behind beating a husband in the kneecaps with a remote. Yea, that works.

Fri Apr 22, 06:27:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Susie, I'm glad the therapist in the group is behind me on this one.

Fri Apr 22, 07:04:00 PM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Jesus Christ on a donut. LadyBug, you never fail to amaze me with your outbursts.

At least no monkeys were harmed in the making of this donut.

Fri Apr 22, 09:46:00 PM  
Blogger greatwhitebear said...

What's really funny is when women still try to be mad even though they know they;ve been had! Then they say things like "DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH, I'M ANGRY!", which makes them laugh even harder!

The former Mrs. Bear once screamed at me "YOUR DRIVING ME CRAZY", to which I replied "Drive, hell, thats not even a short chip shot!". She then tried to hit me with a vase, but was laughing so hard she missed by about 15 feet and knocked the rabbit ears off the tv instead!

Fri Apr 22, 10:51:00 PM  
Anonymous LadyBug said...

Bucky, I amazed myself with that one. Don't know where it came from.

(Oh, and the definition of "amazed" here, is "freaked out.")

Fri Apr 22, 11:13:00 PM  
Blogger Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

Queen La...huh, could of sworn I was referring to MUSIC in my last comment.

:)

Fri Apr 22, 11:51:00 PM  
Blogger Courtney said...

I'm still of the opinion that: A. Some violence is warranted, and B. Sometimes men just need a good baseball bat to the knees. An alluminum one, it was even Dan's as a kid -- a little irony. :)

Sat Apr 23, 11:30:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Courtney, I love it. And I appreciate the metal connection, you know, aluminum, irony????

Sat Apr 23, 11:36:00 AM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Mr. B - Queen LaQueefa's actually singin' on this one, jazz and R&B if I remember correctly.
I defer to Squirl for details, since she's heard it.

Sat Apr 23, 11:58:00 AM  
Anonymous Danielle said...

oh, you totally had me giggling out loud at this.

'Cause you want to hit them sooooo badly, but you know you aren't supposed to...
eMOtional vs. rational
EMOTIONAL vs. RAtional
emotional vs. RATIONAL

I guess rational wins.

damn.

Sat Apr 23, 12:49:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Mr B and Bucky, yes, Dana Owens, AKA Queen Latifah, actually sings on this. She's not too bad. There are some old jazz standards and some R& B. http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B0002XL1XU/qid=1114292468/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i1_xgl15/104-9488613-0253555?v=glance&s=music&n=507846
Don't know if this link will work, but if you go to Amazon and look at the Dana Owens album you can listen to bit of each of the songs. She sounds pretty good.

Danielle - So glad to give you a chance to giggle out loud. You're right. You just can't do that kind of physical damage, but it's sooooo tempting!

Sat Apr 23, 05:46:00 PM  
Blogger Susie said...

Oh, Squirl, your post reminded me of an old incident. Waaaay back when Jif and I were silly kids, and our little neighborhood video store got an "adult" (read:"perv") section, behind a white curtain, we went behind the curtain and we rented one of the kind of videos that Bucky likes, just to be goofy. So we go home, to an apartment with paper-thin walls, and we put it in. Just about the time I'm ready to say, "OK, curiosity satisfied, that's enough," we hear the couple next door fighting AGAIN, yelling all sorts of things at each other. Jif then turns the volume on our TV ALL the way up, so that our neighbors here a woman's voice screaming "F*** me up the a$$!!!!" over and over at top volume. The neighbors stopped fighting and were dead silent. I'm sure they put a glass up to the wall. Jif was laughing silently and hysterically, and I was mortified. Never did look those neighbors in the eye again. I should have beaten him with the remote right then.

Sat Apr 23, 06:53:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Susie, I love your story. Ichabod would think that was funny, too.

Reminds me now... In that same apartment Ichabod and I had been drinking some wine. We thought a little "afternoon delight" was just what was needed. The neighbor's living room was right over our bedroom. I thought I was being very quiet but as soon as we were done the guys upstairs started cheering. Ichabod was sure they were just watching football and someone had scored. I thought they were cheering a different kind of score. :-)

Sat Apr 23, 07:52:00 PM  
Blogger Kitty said...

I'll have to remember that trick Susie!!

When I get mad I'm more likely to say the dumbest things. While engaged in conversation with friends last night, I got frustrated because I couldn't seem to recruit anyone into my "I think outside of the box" club.

I got so pissed at one of the guys and just yelled out "WELL I HOPE YOU ENJOY MAKING ME FEEL LIKE A JEW ON CHRISTMAS!!!"

Yes, folks, I always make an ass out of myself. Luckily for the male population, I usually lose the remote control so I really can't attack them with it. Beware of flying ashtrays though.

Sat Apr 23, 07:53:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Kitty always knows what to say. :-)

Sat Apr 23, 08:31:00 PM  
Blogger Courtney said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Sat Apr 23, 10:44:00 PM  
Blogger Courtney said...

I'm stone-cold sober, and I screwed my comment up...
Another thought with the remote control -- Since men always have to play "couch commando," and hog the remote, they deserve to get hit on the knee caps.

I think your comments are turning into "Donahue."

Courtney (I'm not trying to be stealth or anything. I switched my non-family oriented LJ blog over to blogspot)

Sat Apr 23, 10:50:00 PM  
Blogger Kitty said...

DUDE DUDE DUDE
someone just sent me a link to squirrel porn...

http://www.scarysquirrel.org/hta.html

Sun Apr 24, 01:27:00 AM  
Blogger Bucky Four-Eyes said...

Kitty...that's just wrong. And I couldn't stop clicking.

Susie..."the kind of videos that Bucky likes"
You rented leper porn? My favorite is Cumming Apart at the Seams

Sun Apr 24, 08:45:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Requiscat - Welcome to my blog. In this case I guess I don't have any right to hit him with the remote. He never has it. I'm always the one who changes channels and volume. I always handle the videos and dvds, too. Maybe that's why we never watch any porn.

Sun Apr 24, 09:01:00 AM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Kitty, that's a pretty racy site.

Bucky, that's really, really sick!

Sun Apr 24, 09:41:00 AM  
Blogger Courtney said...

Squirl, no, no, no... I'm the same Courtney who always posts... :)

Sun Apr 24, 10:12:00 AM  
Blogger Susie said...

leper. porn. Squirl, can't you do something with her?

Sun Apr 24, 03:04:00 PM  
Blogger Squirl said...

Oops, sorry Courtney, didn't realize you were you.

Susie, don't you think if I could have done something with her it would have been done long ago? :-)

Sun Apr 24, 05:44:00 PM  

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